“Week four’s survival-curve traps were worth the seat. I still think the homework cadence is brisk if you also ship on Fridays.”
Flagship studio
Cohort Signal Lab
Six weeks on the shape of remaining. You will leave with a lattice you can defend, not a dashboard theme.
Who it is for
Product leads and analysts who already have an event stream and a year of history. If you are still naming the first tap, start with Event Grammar. If your question is “why does this step vanish,” Funnel Forensics is the better seat.
We assume you can export a CSV or query a product analytics tool. We do not assume you enjoy presenting to a sceptical finance partner. That discomfort is part of the homework.
Modules
01
Inventory without folklore
Rebuild the event list from the app, not from the wiki. Mark aliases, zombies, and properties that never earned their keep.
02
Install week is not a personality
Separate novelty from habit. We draw the first fourteen days as a map, not as a victory slide.
03
Cohort lattices
Slice by acquisition week, device class, and first successful task — never by a vanity persona name.
04
Survival curves that can lie
Censoring, late events, clock changes, and the quiet effect of a crashed session definition.
05
Silence as a signal
Missing return events, notification permission gaps, and what “churned” should mean in a product with seasonal use.
06
The one-page board memo
Three numbers, one caveat, one request. Written in English a non-analyst director in the United Kingdom will finish.
Learning outcomes
By the closing review you should be able to: explain D1/D7/D30 without hiding sample size; defend a session definition; show where a vendor default inflated remaining users; and hand a PM a brief that names the next instrumentation change rather than a vague “engagement” wish.
Dr Miriam Calder
Former analytics lead at a UK media app, now the desk’s principal tutor. Miriam wrote the first Cohort Signal Lab notes in 2019 after watching too many quarterly decks treat a notification spike as a strategy.
Informational pricing
A Packet Studio seat for this programme is listed at £1,850. A Listening Seat (recordings and notes only) is £420. A Grid Fellowship that includes this studio for three named people is £4,900. Figures exclude VAT where it applies. Nothing is billed through this website — write to the desk or see seats.
Questions we actually get
Do I need Amplitude, or will Mixpanel do?
Either, or a warehouse extract. The studio is about the shape of remaining, not a vendor certification. Bring whatever you can query.
Is there a certificate?
A short letter from the desk, if you complete the memos. We do not issue badges, and we will not pretend a PDF proves you can read a lattice.
What will this programme not do?
It will not teach server-side warehouse modelling in dbt, identity resolution, or incrementality experiments for paid acquisition. We stop at the event stream and the product-facing retention brief. Several students have been disappointed by that boundary; it is better to know before you enrol.
What if I miss a live Tuesday?
Recordings go up the next morning. You still owe the memo. The live critique is sharper, but the notes stand on their own.
From people who sat this studio
★★★★☆
Naima, Cardiff: “The board memo template embarrassed our old 18-slide pack. The iOS/Android lattice exercise assumed more SQL than I had; a colleague helped.”
Ask about the next cohort
Tell us the product category and which analytics tool you live in. We reply within two working days.